This was the second year that the phone didn’t ring before the crack of dawn on my birthday. I didn’t think about it during the morning. It wasn’t until I laid down to go to sleep when there were only 2 minutes left of my birthday that I remembered. I thought about how much I just missed her. Even all of the crazy, quirky things. Even being woken up at the crack of dawn. Especially being called “cookieface”.
As I closed my eyes to fight back tears I realized I could still hear it. I still had the memory of what her voice sounded like when she sang happy birthday. I couldn’t help but smile. God has been so kind to help me time after time smile through the tears. To laugh when things are ridiculous ~ to sing when I just want to cry. To remind me that this is now, but the best is yet to come.
One day I won’t have to wake up to silence. One day things won’t be ridiculous. One day there won’t be any tears to smile through. One day. That day. I can’t wait.